Thduof

**"Toilet Tango"** *(In the style of Arctic Monkeys)* (Verse 1) Well, I woke up this morning, with a rumble down below, A storm was brewin’ in the deep, and I knew it had to go. I shuffled to the bathroom, with a purpose in my stride, The porcelain throne was callin’, and I couldn’t run or hide. (Pre-Chorus) Oh, the pressure’s risin’, like a bassline in my gut, I’m sweatin’ like a sinner in a Sunday holy rut. (Chorus) It’s a toilet tango, baby, do the doo-doo dance, A one-way ticket to relief, I’m takin’ my chance. Oh, the flush is like a symphony, the water’s swirlin’ round, I’m the king of this bathroom, yeah, I’m wearin’ the crown. (Verse 2) The tiles are cold beneath my feet, the air is thick with dread, But I’m a man on a mission, with a fire in my head. I grip the seat like handlebars, and brace for what’s to come, This ain’t no time for second thoughts, the deed must now be done. (Pre-Chorus) Oh, the tension’s breakin’, like a dam about to burst, I’m ridin’ on the wave, yeah, I’m quenchin’ this cursed thirst. (Chorus) It’s a toilet tango, baby, do the doo-doo dance, A one-way ticket to relief, I’m takin’ my chance. Oh, the flush is like a symphony, the water’s swirlin’ round, I’m the king of this bathroom, yeah, I’m wearin’ the crown. (Bridge) And when it’s over, I feel light as a feather, Like I’ve conquered the world, and the weather’s gettin’ better. But the smell lingers on, like a ghost in the air, So I light up a match, and I pretend not to care. (Outro) So here’s to the moments, when nature takes its course, To the toilet tango, and its unrelenting force. I’ll be back again tomorrow, when the rumble starts to grow, But for now, I’m walkin’ out, with a victorious glow. *(Cue gritty guitar riff and a cheeky drum fill as the song fades out.)*

[Verse] Hairaan hoon ki kuch bhi na mangu Kabhi Jo tum mere ho ye kaisi hai khushi Aisa ho kyun? Ki sab lagta haasil hai Jo tum mere ho lagti jannat ka mahaal hai [Verse 2] Jo tum ho saath toh raaste bhi suhaane Par tum bin jeevan lage veerane Hawa bhi khushboo bhari lagne lagi Tum bin jeena mushkil lagne lagi [Chorus] Jo tum mere ho toh sab kuch pyara Aur tum na ho toh sab bekaara Pyaar ki yeh dor kabhi na tootne paaye Bas tum hi tum ho mujhmein samaaye [Verse 3] Sapne sajti hai pal pal aankhon mein Tum ho toh lage apni baahon mein Ehsaas yeh dil se kabhi na jaaye Tujhse pyaar ka rishta juda na ho paaye [Verse 4] Zindagi ka har lamha tumse saja hai Tere bina har pal veeran sa laga hai Jo tum mere ho toh main hun raaja Tum bin zindagi aadhi adhuri rega [Chorus] Jo tum mere ho toh sab kuch pyara Aur tum na ho toh sab bekaara Pyaar ki yeh dor kabhi na tootne paaye Bas tum hi tum ho mujhmein samaaye

[Verse] Barkha Rani aao tum Aapna jal barsao tum Barkha Rani Barkha rani Kaha se layi itna paani [Verse 2] Garmi door bhagati ho Hum sab ko harsati ho Barkha Rani aao tum Dharti ko nahelao tum [Chorus] Vaan me hariyaali chhaaye Tumhara jadoo sab pe chaaye Sookhe mitti me khushboo aaye Nayi umeed hum me laaye [Verse 3] Boondon ki ek sargam bajaao Sadiyon ka sukh chain lao Barkha piyaasi dharti par Har khushboo se milao [Bridge] Aangan me rahe no dhoop Tumhare aane se aaye new soop Har chaahat puri ho Barkha rangin ghata roop [Verse 4] Thandi thandi hawa le aayegi Nayi kahaniya sunayegi Barkha Rani aao tum Har ghar me khushi ban jao tum

Verse 1: Tere bina, sab kuch adhoora Dil ki har ek baat, ab hai khoya Chupke se jo, tu paas tha Ab wo lamha, ab door ho gaya Chorus: Kahan se laoon, teri yaadon ka sahaara Dil ke kone mein, dard ka hai ujra sa maara Teri khushboo, meri rooh mein bas gayi Tere bina jeena, ek zindagi ki saza ban gayi Verse 2: Meri har ek subah, teri kami mein kho jaati hai Jitni baar bhi muskuraoon, wo dard khud hi dikh jaati hai Tere bina har raat, andheron se ghira rehta hoon Har khushi ke baad, dard ki ek nayi kahani sunta hoon Chorus: Kahan se laoon, teri yaadon ka sahaara Dil ke kone mein, dard ka hai ujra sa maara Teri khushboo, meri rooh mein bas gayi Tere bina jeena, ek zindagi ki saza ban gayi Bridge: Kabhi socha nahi tha, ye faasla ho jayega Tere bina jeene ka, yeh safar itna udaas ho jayega Phir bhi tu mujh mein kahi, ik chhupi si baat ho jayega Meri duniya, teri yaadon ke aas paas ho jayega Outro: Tere bina, har raasta ajnabi sa lagta hai Meri zindagi, tere bina ab kehna nahi lagta hai Bas tu aajaye, dil ki duaaon mein tu samajh jaaye Tere bina jeena, ab ek khali zindagi ho jaaye.

चूत पे तेरा नाम लिख लिया, तेरे लन्ड को मुंह में रख लिया रे, तेरे बिना अधूरी हूँ मैं राजा अब तो लेने भीतर आजा, तेरे नाम की मेहंदी रचा दी चूत पे अब ये छेद किसी और को ना दूंगी रे, तेरे सपनों की राहों मेंही चलूँगी साजन, तेरे लन्ड सिवा अब कुछ और ना लूंगी रे तेरे लन्ड से जो मिठास बहती है, मेरे दिल की हर धड़कन चखती जाए रे आजा बाहों में, छुपा के चोददे मुझको बरना ख्वाबों में ही चोदता रह जाए रे आजा चोदले राजा मुझको, तेरी चाहत मिटा दूंगी, तेरे नाम की मेहंदी रचा दी चूत पे अब ये छेद किसी और को ना दूंगी, तेरे सपनों की राहों मेंही चूदलूँगी साजन तेरे लन्ड सिवा अब कुछ और ना लूंगी रे।

चूत पे तेरा नाम लिख लिया, तेरे लन्ड को मुंह में रख लिया रे, तेरे बिना अधूरी हूँ मैं राजा अब तो लेने भीतर आजा, तेरे नाम की मेहंदी रचा दी चूत पे अब ये छेद किसी और को ना दूंगी रे, तेरे सपनों की राहों मेंही चलूँगी साजन, तेरे लन्ड सिवा अब कुछ और ना लूंगी रे तेरे लन्ड से जो मिठास बहती है, मेरे दिल की हर धड़कन चखती जाए रे आजा बाहों में, छुपा के चोददे मुझको बरना ख्वाबों में ही चोदता रह जाए रे आजा चोदले राजा मुझको, तेरी चाहत मिटा दूंगी, तेरे नाम की मेहंदी रचा दी चूत पे अब ये छेद किसी और को ना दूंगी, तेरे सपनों की राहों मेंही चूदलूँगी साजन तेरे लन्ड सिवा अब कुछ और ना लूंगी रे।

चूत पे तेरा नाम लिख लिया, तेरे लन्ड को मुंह में रख लिया रे, तेरे बिना अधूरी हूँ मैं राजा अब तो लेने भीतर आजा, तेरे नाम की मेहंदी रचा दी चूत पे अब ये छेद किसी और को ना दूंगी रे, तेरे सपनों की राहों मेंही चलूँगी साजन, तेरे लन्ड सिवा अब कुछ और ना लूंगी रे तेरे लन्ड से जो मिठास बहती है, मेरे दिल की हर धड़कन चखती जाए रे आजा बाहों में, छुपा के चोददे मुझको बरना ख्वाबों में ही चोदता रह जाए रे आजा चोदले राजा मुझको, तेरी चाहत मिटा दूंगी, तेरे नाम की मेहंदी रचा दी चूत पे अब ये छेद किसी और को ना दूंगी, तेरे सपनों की राहों मेंही चूदलूँगी साजन तेरे लन्ड सिवा अब कुछ और ना लूंगी रे।

[Verse] Hum hain sehat kahani yaaron Thame haath toh dur ho gaye gham saare Bimar bhi bhagayga khushi ke maaron Ye pal hai apna jeet ka jashn manaye [Verse 2] Yahan hai babar sab jaane naam Uske paas hai har takleef ka hal Saath milke banayein sapno ka aam Aao chalo jeevan ko banaye rangila mahal [Chorus] Sehat kahani ka phal mil jaye Bimari bhagay sab thik ho jaye Chamatkar sa yeh palpati ho Sehat se hum zindagi mein rang layen [Bridge] Kholo mann aur bano naya rasta Yeh kahani koi dekhna hai basta Sehat ki ore kadam ubharein Aao sapno ko sach kar dikhayein [Verse 3] Takleefon ki duniya chhodein hum Jeevan ki raaho ko sukh se bhare hum Sehat kahani banayein sab jagah Har dil mein ho bas khushi aur pyaar [Chorus] Sehat kahani ka phal mil jaye Bimari bhagay sab thik ho jaye Chamatkar sa yeh palpati ho Sehat se hum zindagi mein rang layen

Hum tere bin ab reh nahi sakte, Dil ke armaan keh nahi sakte. Har pal tujhko yaad karun main, Teri raahon mein saanse bharun main. (Verse 2) Chhod ke mujhko tu kahaan chala gaya, Meri duniya ko tu aise mita gaya. Aankhon mein aansu, dil hai udaas, Tere bina suuna suuna hai saara samaaj. (Chorus) Tere bin adhura hoon, Jaise chaand bina roshni. Dil ki har ek dhadkan mein, Bas tu hi tu hai basi. (Verse 3) Mitti ki tarah bikhar gaya hoon, Tere wade yaadon mein mar gaya hoon. Mohabbat meri tujhse ab bhi hai, Par tu toh kisi aur ka ho gaya hai. (Bridge) Main dhoondhta hoon tujhe har kahani mein, Par tu nahi hai meri zindagani mein. Aayega kya tu laut kar kabhi? Ya reh jayega bas ek adhura sapna kabhi? (Outro) Hum tere bin ab reh nahi sakte, Dil ke armaan keh nahi sakte…

Yo, there’s a guy named Jordan, got a forehead so wide, When he walks in the room, the whole place just sighs. It’s like a landing strip, you can see it from afar, That forehead’s so big, it could be its own star. Jordan don’t need no hat, don’t need no cap, His hairline’s like a map, no need to recap. Every time he turns, it’s like a solar flare, That forehead’s the reason we all stop and stare. Big forehead, it’s the talk of the town, When he walks by, we all just break down. He’s got that dome, that’s bigger than most, But that’s his crown, yeah, he loves to boast! Big forehead, it’s a feature so bold, Even in the winter, he don’t need no cold! He’s rockin’ that space, he’s owning the scene, That forehead’s a flex, it’s so supreme! He’s got wisdom in that dome, no lie, That forehead’s got stories that’ll never die. It’s like a billboard, it’s hard to miss, It’s his signature, you know it’s bliss. You might think it’s funny, but Jordan don’t care, That big forehead’s his, and he’ll wear it with flair. He’s got the confidence, the brains, the style, That forehead’s big, but his heart’s got the smile! Big forehead, it’s the talk of the town, When he walks by, we all just break down. He’s got that dome, that’s bigger than most, But that’s his crown, yeah, he loves to boast! Big forehead, it’s a feature so bold, Even in the winter, he don’t need no cold! He’s rockin’ that space, he’s owning the scene, That forehead’s a flex, it’s so supreme! Some say it’s too big, but Jordan don’t mind, That forehead’s a treasure, one of a kind. He’s livin’ large, he’s breakin’ the mold, With that big forehead, he’s solid gold. So here’s to Jordan with the dome so tall, He stands out in a crowd, he’s above ‘em all. That forehead’s his charm, no need to pretend, With that big forehead, he’s got no friends!

The penis on the man goes up and down, Up and down, up and down. The penis on the man goes up and down, All through the town. The nutsack on the man hangs low and free, Hangs low and free, hangs low and free. The nutsack on the man hangs low and free, All through the town. The "Y" chromosome says "man" to me, "Man" to me, "man" to me. The "Y" chromosome says "man" to me, All through the town. If he cuts it off, he's still a man you see, Man you see, man you see. If he cuts it off, he's still a man you see, All through the town. If he grows some boobs, he's still a man to me, Man to me, man to me. If he grows some boobs, he's still a man to me, All through the town.

Стефан каза, ама кой да слуша, че майката на Любо не е никак малка. А на масата като седне – става чудо, лопатата ѝ е вечно във ръката. Стефан беше прав, няма спор! Като багер тя яде с размах и с хор. Хляб, тави, компоти – всичко върви, а Стефан гледа и само мълви: “Казах ви, нали?” Поръчаха порция – тя поиска пет, готвачът избяга, сервитьорът е в шок. Любо се смее, но тайно се моли, че хладилникът няма да стигне за още три дни. Стефан беше прав, няма спор! Като багер тя яде с размах и с хор. Хляб, тави, компоти – всичко върви, а Стефан гледа и само мълви: “Казах ви, нали?” Легендите ще разказват за таз вечер, как опразни квартала – и то без късметче. Лопатата блесна, а масата скърши, а Стефан се смее: “Казах ви, нали?” Стефан беше прав, няма спор! Тя изяде всичко, без капка позор. Три готвача се скриха, месарят реве, а Любо я гледа и тайно трепери. “Казах ви, нали?”